Selfish. The world has it's most advanced creature torturing it's people and nature with blatant selfishness.
Respect. The respect left in the population has diminished. What is left is hatred for kind and delusions in the minds...
Watch and enjoy......................
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Tomorrow's Mothers' Day. But do people cherish and love their life-giver? I don't know much about you guys' devotion to your mum or lack there-of, but I know I do. I treasure the every moment we shared with the family, be it clashing of ideals or the sweet little family moments (ie. dinners, birthdays, events).
I remember Mothers' Day every year to be a really festive occasion, much more meaningful than Christmas or Chinese New Year combined. Relatives from the maternal side would congregate at my grandmother's house. Cousins I've not seen for ages, aunties and uncles whose names I barely get hold of. This is it, the celebration of Life, of maternal care, of love, of concern, of the everything given to us and of the women in our lives. Which brings me to the Mothers' Day celebrations my maternal grandmother had organised a few days ago.
Though the celebrations wasn't anything too regal, it was filled with much laughter and joy. The atmosphere could be compared to a wedding banquet, sans the fanfare and the expensive food. But an element was terribly missing, to the extent of undue silence even. Something or someone seem to be missing in the picture. It was awkward for us. My grandmother seems to be filled with even more emotion when the time bids us to go. Heartwrenching as it was, life still has to go on. Some things are better left unsaid. But what raced through my mind throughout the celebrations and after was the reminder of how our family's "love from above" brought us much happiness within the occasion, which could be felt from the relatives too.
(Lazy to continue......)
I remember Mothers' Day every year to be a really festive occasion, much more meaningful than Christmas or Chinese New Year combined. Relatives from the maternal side would congregate at my grandmother's house. Cousins I've not seen for ages, aunties and uncles whose names I barely get hold of. This is it, the celebration of Life, of maternal care, of love, of concern, of the everything given to us and of the women in our lives. Which brings me to the Mothers' Day celebrations my maternal grandmother had organised a few days ago.
Though the celebrations wasn't anything too regal, it was filled with much laughter and joy. The atmosphere could be compared to a wedding banquet, sans the fanfare and the expensive food. But an element was terribly missing, to the extent of undue silence even. Something or someone seem to be missing in the picture. It was awkward for us. My grandmother seems to be filled with even more emotion when the time bids us to go. Heartwrenching as it was, life still has to go on. Some things are better left unsaid. But what raced through my mind throughout the celebrations and after was the reminder of how our family's "love from above" brought us much happiness within the occasion, which could be felt from the relatives too.
(Lazy to continue......)
Friday, February 22, 2008
Special
Nothing
At
All
.
.
.
What if we could turn back time to change things? What if we have the intuitive ability to predict what is unpredictable? Would I have known to treasure the ones around me? Sometimes it gets tiring. People in, people out. Subjective happiness isn't all that it seems. We can't just live the way we want to, concessions should be made, decision shouldn't be swift.
Incoherent thoughts I say. Mumbo Jumbo, gibberish, trash machine? Or an Autodiktat to take misery out of your life? I really can't the light at the end of the tunnel. Everytime I saw what seems to be the end of the tunnel, it turns out to be lighted matchsticks which serves to fool you into delusion. You thought it's game over, but it just doesn't stop there. The game goes on. The only way of maneuvering out of this tunnel is to play dead, or till the day you die. There isn't any hard and durile rules and regulations. You just take a step at a time. Until death realises it's arrival, you'd still be in the maze. That's right, it ain't exactly a tunnel, it's a maze with many traps.
If you think you could traipse through these amazing little hellhole, well, you are terribly wrong. You see, slaying inner demons isn't as bad as what these shitholes could do to you. Some shreds you into a pulp so that you can't put yourself together, some have psychedelic patterns to amaze you to no end, so as to counter your will to get out of it; such ingenuity, such god-like mechanism. But the most dangerous one is the one that you can never get out of, you drown or you suffer. The only device is to invoke your will-power, your motivative approaches.
The best hellhole and the least dangerous one is the one which places you in shit, then teleports you out of it back into your life of a maze. Ah, if only some of the badly hit ones could resurface and restart, or even wish for the angelic orifice: life would be re-born.
Nothing
At
All
.
.
.
What if we could turn back time to change things? What if we have the intuitive ability to predict what is unpredictable? Would I have known to treasure the ones around me? Sometimes it gets tiring. People in, people out. Subjective happiness isn't all that it seems. We can't just live the way we want to, concessions should be made, decision shouldn't be swift.
Incoherent thoughts I say. Mumbo Jumbo, gibberish, trash machine? Or an Autodiktat to take misery out of your life? I really can't the light at the end of the tunnel. Everytime I saw what seems to be the end of the tunnel, it turns out to be lighted matchsticks which serves to fool you into delusion. You thought it's game over, but it just doesn't stop there. The game goes on. The only way of maneuvering out of this tunnel is to play dead, or till the day you die. There isn't any hard and durile rules and regulations. You just take a step at a time. Until death realises it's arrival, you'd still be in the maze. That's right, it ain't exactly a tunnel, it's a maze with many traps.
If you think you could traipse through these amazing little hellhole, well, you are terribly wrong. You see, slaying inner demons isn't as bad as what these shitholes could do to you. Some shreds you into a pulp so that you can't put yourself together, some have psychedelic patterns to amaze you to no end, so as to counter your will to get out of it; such ingenuity, such god-like mechanism. But the most dangerous one is the one that you can never get out of, you drown or you suffer. The only device is to invoke your will-power, your motivative approaches.
The best hellhole and the least dangerous one is the one which places you in shit, then teleports you out of it back into your life of a maze. Ah, if only some of the badly hit ones could resurface and restart, or even wish for the angelic orifice: life would be re-born.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Saturday, December 08, 2007
Sacrifice
Are there anything else more pronounced and important as the word "Sacrifice"? Why do we make sacrifices? What is sacrifice? Why make it the most oft-used word on earth? Why not "regrets", give-and-take, or other more plebian words come out of our mouth? Is sacrifice that important? Why does it lead us to make the unexpected happen, the expected to be wiped away like sweat and the ominous to assume form? It is that surly sense of trying to outdo the impossible with tarradiddles and a false sense of insecurity that enables us to foremost use sacrifice as a form of give-and-take. Sacrifices makes us feel important.
"Oh, let me be the one to take the rap" "Gimme some credo, I'll do your shit" "I want nothing from you, I just wanna do something for you"
Sounds familiar? I can gauge that, on a scale of one to five, I say you are a lousy, fucking piece of shitass tramp. Happiness seems to always get in the way of sacrifice eh? "Oh, my happiness meant nothing more than your satisfaction" Total bollocks. Stop betraying yourself, look yourself in the mirror and say that your lies are ludicriously some sort of God-given truths!
I used to be the sort who thinks that life is all about sacrifices. Everything I do, I do it for my loved ones, without much care of a form of repayment or consequences. I might have appeared selfish, but trust me, I do contemplate all possibilities though it does appear to be in my favour. I guess most situations tend to bring me into the light as a villain. My dreams seem stupid, if not, incredulous, to those who are my blood kin. They persuade me to give it up, so I did. I thought I should continue with the business of pleasing everyone in my spectrum, including total strangers. But now it seems, all the delusions shall be vanquished. I should not be living in sacrifice, a life of sacrifices isn't worth it. If I die a sad man, I won't. I will live up to my name, of being adventurous and tongue-in-cheek. I can soar above the skies without the help of those detractors. I can do without sacrifices!! I shall live like a gypsy! Seek freedom, breathe freedom, relinquish a world of biding.
More importantly, be my own Autodiktat.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Meow I
It has been almost a week since her passing. The withering plants and hibernating bears seems to have gained a new light as the plants began to produce little studs of what seems like leaves while the bears awake from their deep slumber. A new beginning has come. The Dad went from wallowing in self-pity to drowning sorrow in red poison. I still can't think of a better word than this: self destruction. Maybe self-destruction would suffice into transformation, and from there, like the almost awaken bear, a new cycle of stuffing berries and fish into your mouth for added warmth and pounds to ward off danger. The bears think about it's previous endeavors like its adventure through rough terrains and naked lakes to search for food. Juxtapose against this is the yearning for Her, as the Dad and probably the whole kindred recounts the blissful serenade of Her voice. The motherly care and love couldn't be more evident as every Christmas was a surprise; a party.
Everytime Her presence calls for a wide variety of socialising, food, dance and obvious merry-making. I couldn't have been here without her help, ipso facto. The beau ideal She advocate is a world of peace and harmony; of course, with as much hardwork as possible, one could soar above the endless sky and the ski across the eternal abyss of the vast ocean. One could not help but feel extremely at home with her. She is the Perfect Mother, a Mother Goddess now dare I say. Her then flowy hair and silky skin could pass of as a maiden, though the slight wrinkled hands She possess was due to the countless working hours in the office. She is the epitome of greatness, of balance and of capability. She inspired me with Her patience, Her prudence and her undying determination to pursue material nirvana for us. We could have easily be sleeping on the streets if not for her articulate attempts at ameliorating our lifestyles. The Dad could not have more agreed that with her calibre, the company would not have become what it now is: a stately and thriving business. The pain-staking hours she took to nurture us and at the same time work with conviction could no longer be retrieved. She has done her part and could now be assured of the future as we take over. Well, the Trinity, not more not less because I could not see myself in it. You can't call it THE Quartet can you?
(To be continued due to time constraint)
Everytime Her presence calls for a wide variety of socialising, food, dance and obvious merry-making. I couldn't have been here without her help, ipso facto. The beau ideal She advocate is a world of peace and harmony; of course, with as much hardwork as possible, one could soar above the endless sky and the ski across the eternal abyss of the vast ocean. One could not help but feel extremely at home with her. She is the Perfect Mother, a Mother Goddess now dare I say. Her then flowy hair and silky skin could pass of as a maiden, though the slight wrinkled hands She possess was due to the countless working hours in the office. She is the epitome of greatness, of balance and of capability. She inspired me with Her patience, Her prudence and her undying determination to pursue material nirvana for us. We could have easily be sleeping on the streets if not for her articulate attempts at ameliorating our lifestyles. The Dad could not have more agreed that with her calibre, the company would not have become what it now is: a stately and thriving business. The pain-staking hours she took to nurture us and at the same time work with conviction could no longer be retrieved. She has done her part and could now be assured of the future as we take over. Well, the Trinity, not more not less because I could not see myself in it. You can't call it THE Quartet can you?
(To be continued due to time constraint)
Friday, October 12, 2007
Do you feel that a lifetime of regrets would change things, or do you feel that a certain sense of sentimentality instead of pathos should coincide with your guilt and longing for a certain someone, be it a loved one or a total stranger? How do you feel if one day, that certain someone just disappears out of your life, with just nothing but memories to hold on to. Pictures disintegrate, yellowed and suspiciously looking downright silverfish bitten. Material possessions like handbags, clothes and perfumes started going missing, as if that someone had taken it back with them. Would people in their right mind start emulating the familiarity and intimacy established throughout their lives in their sleep?
We do not need a crash course to realise that such ideas are banal to our sense of well-being. Death is a realisation of truths, a transformation of the person and the people affected by his/her death. Nothing is impervious to aging, illness and finally, death. Why delve in memories and pathos when a future without the loved one meant a new beginning? Our constant attachment to a lost reality would only stifle growth and sanity. Sanity is a state of being and we can't just let it go just because of setbacks and tragedies. I want to learn to accept the process of death but how many could? When you helplessly look on as the gradual wane of the loved one's physical and mental state, it just became a vicious cycle until the day when the person just stopped breathing. You could do nothing, just stand there, try as you might a sudden rush of emnotions started clouding your perception. "Should I start cutting of their food supply?" "Should I kill her by drowning her with water into the lungs?" "Should I offer a pillow and strangle her?" Or should I look on as euthanasia would only cast me as a cold blooded murderer. You thought life still have to go on, just as flowers bloom and follow with wither.
Well, moving on is simply the solution. See beyond the facets of the process of death and death itself. It would take time but well, acceptance rather than blissful ignorance. Death transforms, we in turn get transformed with each passing day after the death of a loved one. In the end, both parties benefit, as the dead went onto life after death and we move onto better futures.
We do not need a crash course to realise that such ideas are banal to our sense of well-being. Death is a realisation of truths, a transformation of the person and the people affected by his/her death. Nothing is impervious to aging, illness and finally, death. Why delve in memories and pathos when a future without the loved one meant a new beginning? Our constant attachment to a lost reality would only stifle growth and sanity. Sanity is a state of being and we can't just let it go just because of setbacks and tragedies. I want to learn to accept the process of death but how many could? When you helplessly look on as the gradual wane of the loved one's physical and mental state, it just became a vicious cycle until the day when the person just stopped breathing. You could do nothing, just stand there, try as you might a sudden rush of emnotions started clouding your perception. "Should I start cutting of their food supply?" "Should I kill her by drowning her with water into the lungs?" "Should I offer a pillow and strangle her?" Or should I look on as euthanasia would only cast me as a cold blooded murderer. You thought life still have to go on, just as flowers bloom and follow with wither.
Well, moving on is simply the solution. See beyond the facets of the process of death and death itself. It would take time but well, acceptance rather than blissful ignorance. Death transforms, we in turn get transformed with each passing day after the death of a loved one. In the end, both parties benefit, as the dead went onto life after death and we move onto better futures.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
| Advanced Global Personality Test Results
|
personality tests by similarminds.com
Forget the scuttlebutt, remove brashness.
I'm torn,
better not to be reborn,
life needs more than motivation,
wish to scour for more.
Why dead? Then why alive? What incumbent lies! How exuberant. That childhood. How foolish. My adolescence. Why even succumb to temptation when that itself only sinks into an abysmal joint?
How sweet. Tales of lies, trickling down ears. 10 twilights, 52 settings, intruding nights. If only the land of Milk and Honey would calm down. Insurgencies no matter what only comes in groups, not in a country steeped in antiquities! Why bother with missiles and weapons of destruction when death absconded? Just quit the ingenuous and greed surrounding the constitution. Give us a break and stop decades of sufferage and unjustified actions.
better not to be reborn,
life needs more than motivation,
wish to scour for more.
Why dead? Then why alive? What incumbent lies! How exuberant. That childhood. How foolish. My adolescence. Why even succumb to temptation when that itself only sinks into an abysmal joint?
How sweet. Tales of lies, trickling down ears. 10 twilights, 52 settings, intruding nights. If only the land of Milk and Honey would calm down. Insurgencies no matter what only comes in groups, not in a country steeped in antiquities! Why bother with missiles and weapons of destruction when death absconded? Just quit the ingenuous and greed surrounding the constitution. Give us a break and stop decades of sufferage and unjustified actions.
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Autodikdat in the millieu of exuberance
Dead. Zombified. Nothing to say. The end. Taken out. Pushed to the limit. Asleep, Belly up, Bloodless, Blooey, Breathless, Buried, Cadaverous, Cold, Cut off, Deceased, Defunct, Departed, Done for, Erased, Expired, Extinct, Gone, Inanimate, Inert, Late, Lifeless, Liquidated, Mortified, No more, Not existing, Offed*, Passed away, Perished, Reposing, Rubbed out, Snuffed out, Spiritless, Stiff, Unanimated, Washed up, Wasted.
Saturday, October 08, 2005
This is a list of the quizzes i had taken today, some were of course bullcrap but some were indeed true blue, kinda surprised but were expected answers. Enjoy!
Definitely a turn on people!
C'est mour, look look look! I'm supposedly learning Deutsche, guess this quizz should be revised...lol
Spot-on!
I don't change friends easily damn it!
Erm...let me consider.
Argh! Where are the answers?
Erm... am I?
Hahaha! Yup and stop laughing already its true!
And to the point! Jerks shall f*** off and just go back to being a junk ok?
Anyway, this sums it all up with much accuracy and precision. The only reason I did these quizzes was to amuse and entertain my already bored mind. So to speak, the quizzes are short, so ye get ample time to do it! Thanks to Hana for the abolishing of boredom in my life! LOL! Love y'all!
Till then!
Definitely a turn on people!
| You Are a Goth! |
 You're so gothically outrageous, and you aren't afraid to flaunt it. Whether you dress up like Robert Smith or a tragic Little Bo Peep, chances are that you'll be parading around with the rest of the goths at Yoyogi Park on Sunday. Don't forget your white makeup and blue lipstick! Who knows? You may just get picked up by one of the seedy photographers. |
C'est mour, look look look! I'm supposedly learning Deutsche, guess this quizz should be revised...lol
| You Should Learn French |
 C'est super! You appreciate the finer things in life... wine, art, cheese, love affairs. You are definitely a Parisian at heart. You just need your tongue to catch up... |
Spot-on!
| Your Personality Is |
You are both logical and creative. You are full of ideas. You are so rational that you analyze everything. This drives people a little crazy! Intelligence is important to you. You always like to be around smart people. In fact, you're often a little short with people who don't impress you mentally. You seem distant to some - but it's usually because you're deep in thought. Those who understand you best are fellow Rationals. In love, you tend to approach things with logic. You seek a compatible mate - who is also very intelligent. At work, you tend to gravitate toward idea building careers - like programming, medicine, or academia. With others, you are very honest and direct. People often can't take your criticism well. As far as your looks go, you're coasting on what you were born with. You think fashion is silly. On weekends, you spend most of your time thinking, experimenting with new ideas, or learning new things. |
I don't change friends easily damn it!
| How You Life Your Life |
 You have a good sense of self control and hate to show weakness. You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think. You prefer a variety of friends and tend to change friends quickly. Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down. |
Erm...let me consider.
| Your Hidden Talent |
 You're super sensitive and easily able to understand situations. You tend to solve complex problems in a flash, without needing a lot of facts. Decision making is easy for you. You have killer intuition. The right path is always clear, and you're a bit of a visionary. |
Argh! Where are the answers?
| You Failed the US Citizenship Test |
 Oops, you only got 3 out of 10 right! |
Erm... am I?
| You are an Atheist |
 When it comes to religion, you're a non-believer (simple as that). You prefer to think about what's known and proven. You don't need religion to solve life's problems. Instead, you tend to work things out with logic and philosophy. |
Hahaha! Yup and stop laughing already its true!
| Your Blogging Type is Pensive and Philosophical |
 You blog like no one else is reading... You tend to use your blog to explore ideas - often in long winded prose. Easy going and flexible, you tend to befriend other bloggers easily. But if they disagree with once too much, you'll pull them from your blogroll! |
And to the point! Jerks shall f*** off and just go back to being a junk ok?
| You Are Somewhat Machiavellian |
 You're not going to mow over everyone to get ahead... But you're also powerful enough to make things happen for yourself. You understand how the world works, even when it's an ugly place. You just don't get ugly yourself - unless you have to! |
Anyway, this sums it all up with much accuracy and precision. The only reason I did these quizzes was to amuse and entertain my already bored mind. So to speak, the quizzes are short, so ye get ample time to do it! Thanks to Hana for the abolishing of boredom in my life! LOL! Love y'all!
Till then!
Saturday, September 24, 2005
Creationism? Definitely a hoax
So, there seems to be a new sequence of events that seems incredulous, like the fact that I cannot write full 3 page essays on creationism and evolution, and the inevitable creationism versus evolution; the fact that the Eagles (Australia Rules, read: game) lost by 4 and that the Bush administration are all but squandering money not on the hurricane Katrina victims but on weapons and machinery AND troops to be sent to Iraq and some forsaken land of suicide bombers and extremists. So whats all the fuss about creationism? Is it a theory based solely on faith or scientific discoveries? Can I really say that it is a science? First of all, the afore-mentioned questions applied to the sensitivities of the human psyche. How can anyone ever prove God's existence? The simple answer is people just cannot use faith as a reason to prove a supreme creator's existence (see that I do not put a capital to the S and C). To justify this rationality one must get involved with the scope of the conception of the universe's inner workings. Only then can a person grasp the theories of creationism, to their realisation that such theories are conjured by like-minded individuals who do not understand the concept of the universe.
To even convince such people that the world did not come about within a week is to deprive yourself of the many opportunities you would have used to do much more effective work. Sometimes humans have this concept that just because a book revered as a god's revelation meant that its words should be taken with gravity but in fact it is just a book for people to immerse themselves in to past the day. I admit that some of the words hold true the nature of human character and that some of its guidelines to living a fulfilled life could be applied. But what I can never comprehend is the fact that people can just blindly follow a book and interpret it as a no hold barred instructions to wage war or evangelise; to even believe in a part of the ribcage being taken from the "first" man to create the "first" female is absolute gibberish. The fact is that evolution has done its work and the using of natural selection meant that we have both male and female individuals unlike the amoeba which uses mitosis to produce two different individuals (no gender/gender division). It also means that we cannot just come out being created from mud or some god's hand and voila we have a female companion because a god wants to give us some entertainment and pleasure which is indeed a faux pas.
To even convince such people that the world did not come about within a week is to deprive yourself of the many opportunities you would have used to do much more effective work. Sometimes humans have this concept that just because a book revered as a god's revelation meant that its words should be taken with gravity but in fact it is just a book for people to immerse themselves in to past the day. I admit that some of the words hold true the nature of human character and that some of its guidelines to living a fulfilled life could be applied. But what I can never comprehend is the fact that people can just blindly follow a book and interpret it as a no hold barred instructions to wage war or evangelise; to even believe in a part of the ribcage being taken from the "first" man to create the "first" female is absolute gibberish. The fact is that evolution has done its work and the using of natural selection meant that we have both male and female individuals unlike the amoeba which uses mitosis to produce two different individuals (no gender/gender division). It also means that we cannot just come out being created from mud or some god's hand and voila we have a female companion because a god wants to give us some entertainment and pleasure which is indeed a faux pas.
Thursday, September 22, 2005
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Rationality and not indecision
Since the month of August is coming to an end, I would like to include this entry to sum up my thoughts. August to most people is a month of autumn serene and peaceful idleness (please excuse my Romanticised version of autumn), the time where people would fornicate because of the breezy temperature and warm sunlight that penetrate your skin and fill it up with a crazed amount of oestrogen and for us guys a sense of lascivious zealousness. The only time where your pets would not fill the whole house with their "eau de parfum", most courtesy of their obnoxious habits and an inbuilt knowledge of German gas. For me August would always be summer in Singapore and spring in Australia, the ideal time for some loving from my kindred and preparations for a little bit of slackish endeavors. But with time August seems somewhat of a misogynous month, where you just sit around and contemplate the different opportunities opened to you throughout the whole school term. It is just so amazing when you realise that August is always a month that coincide with the mid-term, so it is not all about playing, its about the more serious stuff, examinations. When we see things as it is, sometimes its hard for us to find the underlying truth behind all these events or academic obstacles (read: tests). It is only when we analyse the whole content over and over over again do we see the brighter side of it and do it with a huge amount of efficiency you just cannot believe your eyes. If we kept on doing this would it not be a better place for society as a whole (?). In fact, I reckon that the only reason why we are in a chaotic mess was because of the constant misinterpretation of religious doctrines, theories of human perception and self-improvement books (sorry but if you had noticed, its been around since the time of the Minoan Period, which was indeed a great place of culture before the Greek culture ever materialised). That said, life as a human could not be tougher in some countries for even if its day time the danger of being murdered was evident by the political and social unrests surrounding the country.
If the only thing that I can do is to lobby for or against a social or theoratical decision then I will fork out the time and a never-say-die spirit to strengthen my mentality. Anyway, point is being in a country that promotes democracy and free speech does not mean it entails a better future. Instead, it will corrode your already rotten mind and turn you into a vegetable with a trance-like look on your face. Discrimination abound so do not be surprised by people shoving you aside or even bashing you to add that touch of alienation from the country itself.
My only plan is to actually avoid people with cut-throat rascism. How do you actually do that you would ask. Well, I read people as if they are some lab experiment and then proceed to ascertain the hypothesis by observing how he would react to a person of another race. If there are none then just brush off the thought of getting to know them because I know these people just do not deserve even a tinge of respect, no matter how much they would try to command it nobody would take heed. Rebellion is an inbuilt mechanism that command us to react with a passion the opposite of what we were asked to do, so of course we would not give a damn for that kind of person (read: Loser).
When September comes I would have to rethink the possible activities to be included in my chaotic organiser of my neuro-files. So people I would have to leave on this quiet note.
Shhshssh!!
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
I am really going to contemplate reading a book and actually concentrating on that main area of my life called studying (plus homework). I chose the book eventually, considering how interesting the read is, with the texture of the cover and other pages I relish the lush richness and finesse of it. I am sure I am going to enjoy this book, the title which is "The Shadow of the Wind" by Carlos Ruiz Zafon and that will lead to subsequent books of interests that I might pick up along the way. Anyway, enough about that book, wait till I finish then can I give a full review of the book.
Sometimes I cannot get my mind off something, which is my friends back home in Singapore, especially Yenn and Hana, like how they are doing and what is going on with their lives. Even with the constant contact through MSN, it does not really help much because I do not know and cannot even meet up with them in person. Their lives in retrospect used to mean alot to me but now it can only be up to a certain level, beyond that of everyday importance, mainly because I am in another country right now. But then it does not really matter for it means we would try all means to remain in close contact and a bond that would not break no matter how much strain is seeping into the friendship. There might be misunderstandings but that will only last for a day or two, depending on the situation if it does not aggravate. I feel lucky that I can express any problems that occur in our friendship probably because we have been opening up to each other and the understanding strengthens into something adamant in nature.
That said, the only regret I can think of that had happened is the sudden decision to actually move to Australia for my further studies and they only got to know about it only a month or two before my departure. I had this reassurance that tells me that if I have the chance to bond and catch up with them it will be during the summer holidays, which will be loads of fun because it is a two month holiday!
To actually assimilate into the Australian way of life is to relax and participate in as many sports as possible, so I guess I have successfully exercise that rule and I can truly say that the art of elation is the best among all the other forms of emotions. Homework is perhaps my weakness, I cannot really sit down and concentrate in doing my work because of the constant distractions around that would receive my immediate attention. But that can really be arranged by using determination and diligence, these two can actually counter-attack the distractions, so I guess I have got the best solutions to my own problem. With that in check, what can go wrong? I just hope my plans for being pliant in my time-management would allow me to soar to greater heights in academia. Anyway, it is really good that the obligations I have can have a positive role in my life.
What can I really determine is the value of the word time-management.
Sometimes I cannot get my mind off something, which is my friends back home in Singapore, especially Yenn and Hana, like how they are doing and what is going on with their lives. Even with the constant contact through MSN, it does not really help much because I do not know and cannot even meet up with them in person. Their lives in retrospect used to mean alot to me but now it can only be up to a certain level, beyond that of everyday importance, mainly because I am in another country right now. But then it does not really matter for it means we would try all means to remain in close contact and a bond that would not break no matter how much strain is seeping into the friendship. There might be misunderstandings but that will only last for a day or two, depending on the situation if it does not aggravate. I feel lucky that I can express any problems that occur in our friendship probably because we have been opening up to each other and the understanding strengthens into something adamant in nature.
That said, the only regret I can think of that had happened is the sudden decision to actually move to Australia for my further studies and they only got to know about it only a month or two before my departure. I had this reassurance that tells me that if I have the chance to bond and catch up with them it will be during the summer holidays, which will be loads of fun because it is a two month holiday!
To actually assimilate into the Australian way of life is to relax and participate in as many sports as possible, so I guess I have successfully exercise that rule and I can truly say that the art of elation is the best among all the other forms of emotions. Homework is perhaps my weakness, I cannot really sit down and concentrate in doing my work because of the constant distractions around that would receive my immediate attention. But that can really be arranged by using determination and diligence, these two can actually counter-attack the distractions, so I guess I have got the best solutions to my own problem. With that in check, what can go wrong? I just hope my plans for being pliant in my time-management would allow me to soar to greater heights in academia. Anyway, it is really good that the obligations I have can have a positive role in my life.
What can I really determine is the value of the word time-management.
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Ok, I just do not want to know anymore, this torturous siege is stalling me and confusing my already bruised ego. To think ye still have the cheek of even calling me with the rejection I must breeze through like nothing has happened. If ye ask me I just do not know why the attempt at making a fool out of me and then hysterical with a sudden outburst of calls and messages, is this a way of testing my inner strength or is it a practical joke aimed at tormenting my already tired soul. If this is what ye want then I ask for at least the respect I deserve and the credibility for making the effort and mustering a huge amount of almost-forgotten courage to ask ye out or just give me a break and give me a chance for expressing my deepest regard for a relationship. If neither works out then I am satisfied to remain anonymous and us as strangers for the better part of our teenage life or be just acquiantances if the request for friendship is accepted. I for once do not lose out and ye can just happily be the family-oriented, hardworking and diligent person like ye always are. I do not want to contemplate failure or lose for those two are minor and insignificant. If ye stay true to yer feelings then I would not even squirm or make a din and my compliance to yer rights are forevermore enforced. I have said my piece and albeit short, comes from the deepest part of my heart which is of course my soul. I do wish ye the best decision ye make with success and future endeavours fruitful.
I do not wish to repeat the mistake of asking someone out and not being returned the honour, for I have learnt that no matter how hard I have tried, the best that I can hope for is for the appreciation and love of a girl I have set eyes on. This in mind, I am going to concentrate fully on the opportunity my parents had given me from the day I was born, which is education and now education abroad. I can never thank them enough for though their role are not that influential, they have played a crucial role in making me understand the Tao of Human perceptions and behaviour. In my formative years the advice my parents gave and mistakes pointed out have made me who I am today, for without them I would not have known the dark side of human overtures and the lessons remembered my infrastructure. Even though I have my ups and downs and somehow some part of them have affected my parents, they did not conplain for they know that I can stand on my own two feet and though that might sound too risque but it is testimony to the individual I have myself to believe. I shall dedicate this latter part of my blog
to my lovely parents, sweet and contemporary as ever.
I LOVE MOM AND POP FOREVER AND FILIAL PIETY BE A PART OF MY CAUSE!
I do not wish to repeat the mistake of asking someone out and not being returned the honour, for I have learnt that no matter how hard I have tried, the best that I can hope for is for the appreciation and love of a girl I have set eyes on. This in mind, I am going to concentrate fully on the opportunity my parents had given me from the day I was born, which is education and now education abroad. I can never thank them enough for though their role are not that influential, they have played a crucial role in making me understand the Tao of Human perceptions and behaviour. In my formative years the advice my parents gave and mistakes pointed out have made me who I am today, for without them I would not have known the dark side of human overtures and the lessons remembered my infrastructure. Even though I have my ups and downs and somehow some part of them have affected my parents, they did not conplain for they know that I can stand on my own two feet and though that might sound too risque but it is testimony to the individual I have myself to believe. I shall dedicate this latter part of my blog
to my lovely parents, sweet and contemporary as ever.
I LOVE MOM AND POP FOREVER AND FILIAL PIETY BE A PART OF MY CAUSE!
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
Ambiguity or just plain bullshit
The reasons for trying to act as busy as possible is to showcase my intolerance to a particular individual, or so the story goes like this. How I actually get to know that girl is a mystery among sarcastic vandalism and the whatnots, the only good part of her identity is when she is not bugging me and bombarding my room (sans the over-friendly gesture). She is garrulous, uncouth and loud-mouth, she is the equivalent of Donkey of Shrek the movie (Ok, so I believe that Donkey is way better) reading a Sunday Heralds. The only time I can read a book and go online while having a drink on a peaceful day is when girl F (only to protect her identity) is not around beckoning me to watch a movie and/or eating my chocolates (of course I do not mind giving sweet treats to my friends but this? *groans and uttter exasperation*). And I have only known her for a couple of days!
Meeting this person could be the error of a lifetime but it is not that I hate her or discriminate against her colour (read race) but sometimes this kind of person can only deteriorate yer moral and living standards. The only thing ye can do is to get rid of this person or actually tell them that the way they are behaving is just like the primetime television program about some teenagers (especially the clingy ones) ye see on sunday or reprimand them without the slightest of sympathy for them at all! If they still do not listen then get ready yer running shoes because ye life from then on will be an endless course for torment and leech sucking (urgh, just do not get too close to me). Other than that, if the sophomore effort of yers work, then the ever peaceful paradise of calmness and goodwill will hang out like there is no tomorrow (pardon me for the pun). Send me an email, congratulate yerself, enjoy life and organise a party with a few friends and enjoy the freedom that abounds.
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If the only thing that could be worst is the rejecting of a love because the crushing of egos can be brutal and fatal. If just because of that they cannot accept no matter how much ye try to ameliorate or change, then forget about them. I just want to forget that person once and for all, stay as friends or whatsoever, as long as my love for her dies out. Even if reality sets in, I would just move on and give the afore-mentioned event without even a second thought because the past is a fragment of my memory, without definitely any significance but just an in-yer-face warning so that I would not suscept to this kind of adversity. Anyway, the future definitely comes with the uncertainty and I am ready without any doubt of the fishes in the water.
So now it comes to me saying farewell to that past and live with zest the obstacles that is to either baffle or soften me physically and mentally.
Anyway, what is the hurry?
Sunday, July 24, 2005
This is so vague
This is getting so obscure, like everyone I know cannot see, probably only the few with the worldly views and eagled eye enough to spot the difference. It seems that the only time I really get to read is the night (excluding daily visits to torment unsuspecting people, nah I aint like that.) The rationale is that the world is changing, but for how long? I thought that the Age of Aquarius has arrived, or should I say it has been around for actually 4 years and the progress I seek to uncover is dismal in effort. That is to say the ostentious can only wait to slip into a coma and die of ignorance. Why, when we said that new "age" has arrived but the catalysts causing the amelioration can only prove that sometimes humans are blind to the ebb and flow of the cycle and series of events all around us or for that matter the only change people can muster is a change to their pathetic ego. The only time when I have seen a change was approximately one year ago I guess, when the Singaporean Government are changing some of the national aspects like the National Service, which is reduced to two years and the allowance for an even bigger amount of freedom for us citizens is concentrated on. All these afore-mentioned things just stop there, and to aggravate an already irritated me, no news of reforms nor changing social demands and norms whatsoever. I think I will have to wait for some of the news but all are not big enough, like a new idea sweeping across the globe. Reassurance can only be a mistake, so I will have to assuage my standards on this Age of Aquarius then.
What to even anticipate is the social structure and reforms about to be experienced on a global level, the only labile to ever suffice can be the entities present in countries, especially the Middle East, no matter where the extremists and fanatics go, a trail of devilish scent can be sniffed or even seen, perhaps even the word devilish can be form of euphemism and they will decrease in number as sudden as winter becoming summer in one day. So, I can only wait and see then, justifiably I must know about the big events, those that impact on the masses. The nostalgia can only be tamed with the forthcoming events.
What to even anticipate is the social structure and reforms about to be experienced on a global level, the only labile to ever suffice can be the entities present in countries, especially the Middle East, no matter where the extremists and fanatics go, a trail of devilish scent can be sniffed or even seen, perhaps even the word devilish can be form of euphemism and they will decrease in number as sudden as winter becoming summer in one day. So, I can only wait and see then, justifiably I must know about the big events, those that impact on the masses. The nostalgia can only be tamed with the forthcoming events.
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Collision of the great minds (Doesn't necessarily meant the contents)
I would like to say that the recent improvements in Singapore of the Art scene and other social aspects of Singaporean mindsets are positive to raise Singapore to be a more globally accepted nation but that can only prove the strict and abominable aspect of the Singapore government, that is the conservative views they sought to instill in the masses are still noticeably with the every step they had tried to censor films of political and social themes that might affect the young and the "patriotic" people of Singapore. The art scene has a far worst impact from the conservative mindset. Artworks portraying nude people kissing or just standing by a lake with swans and water lilies were considered tasteless and people would rather be languid to these artworks than fanatics of a certain monotheistic religion who would then call on a jihad to exterminate the population and "infidels".
That said, society is one of contradictions, its demands and norms normally directed by a government are fast becoming the jobs of the media, which has to some effect, been monitored or influenced by the said government. If this persist, it will be a a catastrophe sat up by its own jurisdication. To actually counter this form of unnecessary trouble, we must eradicate the contradictions present in the media, especially the newspapers (and to a small effect, magazines). But how are we to even start on this when the many theories that people have contributed leads to the societal demands and norms presented by the media? So what we must do is to leave it as it is, for even if I seem to be contradicting myself that cannot be helped anyway. Thats human nature.
That said, society is one of contradictions, its demands and norms normally directed by a government are fast becoming the jobs of the media, which has to some effect, been monitored or influenced by the said government. If this persist, it will be a a catastrophe sat up by its own jurisdication. To actually counter this form of unnecessary trouble, we must eradicate the contradictions present in the media, especially the newspapers (and to a small effect, magazines). But how are we to even start on this when the many theories that people have contributed leads to the societal demands and norms presented by the media? So what we must do is to leave it as it is, for even if I seem to be contradicting myself that cannot be helped anyway. Thats human nature.
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